Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Water Break

Rainy days have gone by, and the lazy days have taken place. I want a break. So I'm taking one! A very short one will do; I'll allow myself to absent from my classes even just for a couple of days. Call it a reorientation program for my pig-headed self about the plans, goals, resolutions, and whatnot I've set at the start of the sem. (May ganyon?!)

See, with this breather I was able to churn out a decent (i.e. of decent length) blog entry. My engrossment in acads (Talaga lang ha?) and in the 'til-late night BACBACAN practices didn't allow me that. I'm not complaining though, especially with the perks the second reason brings. *Winks*

Oh my God, I'm blushing! Oh wait, it's just my rashes. They resurfaced and they're back with vengeance!
---
I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do, and I hurt myself by hurting you.

It breaks my heart and my spirit to see you cry because of me. Because of us. Because of our situation.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Don't Dance in Trainers When Toenails Are Long

My two toenails are turning violet. They may never see the light of day again. I may never see them the same way again. Ouch.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Crushing You Crushes Me

I can't take it anymore. Whenever you come near or are just in plain sight I supress my kilig, and it's taking its toll on my health. Just the act of remembering you wrings my insides, especially my frail, black heart. Shoo, you!

I have some alternative suggestions though. Let's see.

1.) Reposition your eyes and nose upwards thereby extending the vertical gap between them and between your nose and mouth; and reducing the area of your forehead.

2.) Pull your eyeballs out of their sockets.

3.) Face sideways; the angle does not favor you. Better yet, get out of my sight.

4.) Acquire atrophy.

5.) Be obnoxious as much as I am. Or worse.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

I Feel in My Guts I Will Be Regretting This Very Soon

My CE Bacbacan cheerdance practice started tonight, and I'm exhausted. I'm very, very, very exhausted.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Selfish

People are naturally selfish. They are self-centered and self-absorbed. They act with the end, consciously in mind or not, of propagation and preservation of their selves and their interests.

There are those who, like me, subscribe to such opinion, and of course there are those who deny it, some with all their might or to the extent that their consciences can handle. Obviously, I would favor the former. Nonetheless, I have nothing against those of the latter kind. Whatever that lets them sleep at night, let it be. However, sometimes, and it can't be helped, their display of self-righteousness irks me, irritates me. In the end, I cannot totally blame them. People are selfish after all.
---
I'm sorry for purposely hurting your feelings. I realized I was being childish. By hurting you I just wanted to know how much significant I was to you. Yes, it is an unacceptable justification. With the fear of stretching the distance that vexed me in the first place, I now know the answer.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Before Classes Officially Start


The DBM and DOJ secretaries and the First Daughter

I arrived at UP past 10 AM; first stop was at the Yakal Residence Hall to again inquire and pester Sir Robidillo (sp?), dormitory manager, about my wait-list status. Just when I was about to lose hope of being admitted to said dorm, he handed me some forms to fill out (up? I always mix up.) My lungs nearly burst as I inhaled and exhaled my excitement. I'm halfway to being a mushi Yakalite. (As if that means anything to you.)

I didn't fare with as much luck with the manual enlistment, but it wasn't that bad either. I still have two subjects left to enlist. As my wolf-wearing-sheep-skin act worked with Sir Robidillo, I hope it also does tomorrow with the professors. Awoo! Have you ever heard a wolf cry to the blue corn moon? I have never seen a sem without a torturous registration.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Mushi Enchantment

I got so hooked on "Mushishi" I only went out this day just to attend the HR (and D) postplanning at McDo Katips. My overconfidence will yield me terrible electives and class schedule. Oh well, as if I really care.

I'm three episodes away before completing the anime series; "Saiunkoku Monogatari" is next in line. Super thanks to Jazelli (Oi, magparamdam ka!) for the burned anime she lent. Mi mi mirakuru Mikurun-run, mi mi mirakuru Mikurun-run! Whee!

Monday, November 06, 2006

So Much for Optimism

Yes, Sir Ben Paul dismissed my plea to take BA 142 and BA 129 simultaneously advising that I just take BA 129 next semester. I guess my being "feasibusy" will have to wait a little longer. With BA 129 on my Form 5A about to be cancelled with that green RVC ink, I will have to toil to get through the scourge that is manual enlistment. I still have four subjects lacking; imagine that.
---



Come on, do I really look like Luli Arroyo?
Cbox and the Never-ending Drama

TagBoard mysteriously has vanished off the face of the world wide web. Cbox seems a decent alternative, and it has more features so I switched to it. Feel free to inundate my new tagboard (Is that the generic term?) with your messages of love for me. I need the validation. Badly.
---
More than a week of no blog update has gone by. So many thoughts have been boggling my mind, and I can't seem to have the strength (Nah, I'm just lazy) to organize and put them in writing. Energy escapes me every time I ponder about them. If only I could faint and never regain consciousness ever again, I would. Disgust yourselves by such cowardice. Even I disgust myself.

I'm fazed. I'm overwhelmed. I'm paralyzed.

I'm frail. I'm vulnerable.

But I've got to keep trying.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Keep Cryin'

I don't like being alone...

This year everything seems like a real drag...

The truth is I'm hungrier than it seems. Even though I try and hide my messed up feelings, every morning, I want to destroy the mirror which reflects my weak, natural face.

A wish on a moonlight night, it's a beautiful thing...

I don't care about anything even if I'm running a little late in the morning. I'm going to try my best. How many times have I stupidly got my hopes up? There are no barriers that's why I keep trying.

I don't care about anything while deciding on a cool pose. To tell you the truth, I've been fighting. It's such a precious life; you'll have to reach for each and every bit of rest.

I don't care about anything while making a face like, "Okay, whatever." I've always, always been praying. I want what I don't have. I can't be satisfied that easily so I keep trying.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Heto Ako

What's this I'm hearing that people have been asking about my where...abouts? I'm here if that's what you want to know. The concern is unnecessary; nonethelesss, I appreciate it. To tell the truth, I'm not entirely well (When have I ever been, anyway?), but I'm okay. I think.

It's such a bummer that I have no Internet connection in Pampanga. Technically, I have, but my PC isn't working yet (Jay, help! I'm willing to bring my CPU there in Cavite. *Winks*) At least, television is there to keep the boredom out of my skull. At the most, the semester is finally over. Actually, I force-ended mine a bit earlier. How? By fleeing and never looking back.

Going back to TV, what have caught my interest are two series that have started recently, the Koreanovela "A Rosy Life" and the JDrama "Beautiful Life". If you're for tearjerkers like "Stairway to Heaven" *sighs*, the former is a must-see. The plot is promising; the lead female actor is effective; I can't wait to cry my heart out.


"A Rosy Life"

If you think you've got enough drama in your life than you can handle, try "Beautiful Life" (BL) starring the beautiful Kimura Takuya (Oh my, he's so fvcking hot!) You don't know how much I, out of suppressed kilig, hyperventilate and squeak each time I see him on TV. It's quite embarrassing actually. Haha. Unlike in "Good Luck!!" and in the picture below, he sports a bushy hairstyle. He reminds me of Won Bin circa 2000. Dreamy eyes, plump lips, and all. Sigh.


I'm too lazy to find a better picture.
---
My new motto in life: Keep trying.

I don't care about anything
Even if I'm running a little late in the morning
I'm gonna try my best
How many times have I stupidly
Got my hopes up? There are no barriers
That's why I keep trying
---
P.S.: We have a new puppy in the house. It's white, fluffy, and most of all, adorable (much like this exhibitionist). Kawaii!

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Hikari Sentai Maskman

It's amazing what videos one can dig up on YouTube. I never thought some people still have with them videos of the old sentai series to upload, much more the Tagalog-dubbed version.

Sige, sige, laban, Maskman
Ipagtanggol ang kapayapaan
Sugod, sugod, laban, Maskman...

Sigh. Brings back peachy, childhood memories. Looking back, I can't pinpoint whom among the Maskmen I had a crush on. Hmm, was it Michael Joe or Adrian? Haha.


Cutie Akira (Adrian), Blue Mask


Yay to the Laser Squadron Maskman!
---
Just some clarifications: I've been part of the Special Projects Ad Hoc (SPADHOC) for four semesters now, three of which I've been the co-head. Next semester will be my fourth time, not fifth, to lead the team. Though it'll my first to be the sole head. Ay, ay, ay!

I've been contemplating. Do I really want to put up with the stress heading such a committee brings, again? For the fourth time? Considering SPADHOC is one of the underrated, if not the most underrated ad hoc of CE? To top that, I'll be chair-ing (imbento) another ad hoc, thanks to my vulnerable self-esteem and Virge's coaxing prowess. And, and, and if the Undergraduate Studies Director will permit, I will be "feasibusy," too.

What the heck, bring on the flagellation. Just make sure it wouldn't hurt much. After all, no stress is still stress. Don't ever complain if I churn out mediocre work and go around bitching. Joke.
---
You, you got what you deserved. Nyahaha. >:P
What's the Matter with TagBoard?

To summarize this day with a smiley.

~_~;

Fvck you, you moron! I'll harpoon you in the eye the next time you utter another stupid comment! Shoo, you closeted faggot!

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Escapism

To hell with my exam and paper due tomorrow. I'm staying online.

Now here's something tickling my juvenile sensibilities.





Boku wa kuma kuma kuma kuma
I am not a car bear bear bear
I can't walk but I can dance
I can't talk but I can sing
I am a bear bear bear bear

I am a bear bear bear bear
I hate fighting bear bear bear
My rival is fried shrimp
I was probably chocolate in a previous life
I am a bear bear bear bear

Bonjour! Je m'appelle Kuma. Comment ca va?

I am a bear bear bear bear
The winter is sleepy bear bear bear
In the evening, "Goodnight, Mr. Pillow"
In the morning, "Good morning, Mr. Pillow"
I am a bear bear bear bear

In the evening, "Goodnight, Mr. Pillow"
In the morning, "Good morning, Mr. Pillow"
I am a bear
Mama bear bear


You should check out the music video. Kawaii!

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Patulan Ko Kaya?

"My Communication Research 101 group needs participants for a focus group discussion for our final term paper. If you’re below twenty-five years old, currently living, staying or studying in Metro Manila, and watches films in commercial cinemas at least once every three months, you might be who we need... We will provide your transportation and food, and something extra."-Bikoy of bikoy.net

I wonder what that something extra would be. If it'd a freebie(s), I'd be more than content considering I wouldn't have to pay for my own transportation and there's free food. Yun yun eh! Though it wouldn't hurt if it's money. *Crosses fingers* Haha.

What worries me in the event I accommodate Bikoy's call is that I'd have nothing significant to contribute come the actual FGD itself. As most of you know, when it comes to things like this I just shut my foul mouth, listen attentively to everything that's being said (eavesdropping come so naturally to me), and observe like an FBI profiler (more like a stalker). It'd be embarrassing to waste Bikoy's precious time. Haha.

Plus, I might do something klutzy and idiotic out of sheer starstruck state. I have been reading his blog for almost four years now, you know. But I really want the free food and extra stuff. Because I'm a cheapskate like that.
AnimEmo



I just finished re-watching all the episodes of Fruits Basket. It moved me so much that throughout the marathon I frequently found myself shedding tears to the tribulations of Tohru or a member of the Sohma family, or grinning from ear to ear out of kilig as Kyo, despite his temper and regardless how roughly, manages to manifest his fondness for Tohru. Sigh.



After I finish watching an anime like Fruits Basket, I can help but be emotionally attached to the characters that it's hard to let go and move on, especially if with those characters I have been able not only to sympathize but to empathize as well. The anime may have left me craving for more, in-denial, and, yet again, feeling down; but it's okay. I can't grasp the words that exactly describe how I feel. Right now, I only can say that I'm delightedly depressed. Eek, manic depression!
---
Geekness aside, my cellphone I haven't yet found and, I think, find it I never will. Baka, baka! I didn't want to resort to lying to my mom that the cellphone was snatched, but I can't think of another way to dodge further lecturing, that is, nagging.

The hands of fate, through Norman, keep on bringing us, AJ and I, together. Nothing, not his luck in that card game, his average intellect (mucho bobito), nor my bankruptcy can repel my starstruck self from him.

The moon glows beautifully in all its fullness. The full moon, the fool's moon.

This entry rains with commas. Wala lang.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Only If Moving on Were Easy





In time, there will come a day when everything is just a memory. "With Honey and Clovers"